Schedule for Week of February 23, 2025
-
The key reports this week are January New Home sales, the second estimate
of Q4 GDP, Personal Income and Outlays for January, and Case-Shiller house
prices...
10 Weekend Reads
-
The weekend is here! Pour yourself a mug of Colombia Tolima Los Brasiles
Peaberry Organic coffee, grab a seat by the fire, and get ready for our
longer-f...
The America-First Era Begins
-
This post The America-First Era Begins appeared first on Daily Reckoning.
The American Empire is transitioning into something new entirely...
The post Th...
A slightly belated celebration of President’s Day
-
“America is rock and roll.” — Alfred Howard Did some of you find it hard to
feel the love for President’s Day this year? Well, remember: the reason it
exis...
The Genteel Martyrdom of Israel Haters
-
Melbourne-based supporters of Hamas, the Palestinian jihadist organization,
have engaged in puzzling acts of aggression since Oct. 7, 2023. Why did
they br...
A Few Words On Healthcare
-
I haven’t published anything on here in a long, long time.. Thought it
would be fun to start up again. I wanted to give some stream of
consciousness though...
Happy New Year!
-
2025 Year of the Golden Age "old world, gold economy, as viewed thru modern
eyes" or "way to move from US$ without war". -Another (5/5/98) As you can
see, ...
Understanding the Modern Monetary System – Updated!
-
It’s been over 10 years since I published Understanding the Modern Monetary
System, one of the most widely read papers in the SSRN research database. I
pub...
A Few Quick Announcements
-
By James As I wrote a couple of years ago, I don’t post here anymore. I
just have a couple of updates for people who subscribe and may be
interested in my ...
FTX and an old blog post
-
A long time ago I wrote a blog post about rehypothecation with brokers. It
is - unsurprisingly - relevant again.
In some sense crypto provides fast-track...
Blog Post Title
-
What goes into a blog post? Helpful, industry-specific content that: 1)
gives readers a useful takeaway, and 2) shows you’re an industry expert.
Use your...
Goodbye to Credit Writedowns
-
Good morning everyone, I have some exciting — and also – sad news to tell
you today. First, I am going to Bloomberg as a Senior Editor. And I am
going to...
The Covid-19 Dominoes Fall: The World Is Insolvent
-
To understand why the financial dominoes toppled by the Covid-19 pandemic
lead to global insolvency, let’s start with a household example. The point
of thi...
New Hedge Fund Newsletter Just Released
-
The new Q4 issue of our hedge fund newsletter is now available. It reveals
the latest portfolios of 25 top hedge funds and also features summaries of
2 st...
The gulag that France has become
-
*Here’s a powerful article from Robert Spencer, posted at Front Page
Magazine, that will, more than any other article I’ve read lately, provide
you with...
Do Higher Wages Mean Higher Standards of Living?
-
Editor's note: We have updated macroblog's location on our website,
although archival posts will remain at their original location. Readers who
use RSS sho...
Big D Has Your Rivalries Right Here
-
Editor's Note--Well that wasn't how we like it last week. 2-4. But this
week is rivalry week in the college where you throw out the records and
teams play ...
What’s the best type of healthcare system?
-
If we’re going to improve our healthcare system, it’s worth looking closely
at the experiences of other rich democratic countries. There are two
principal ...
French Rescue Four Hostages Lose Two Soldiers
-
Viva Liberty! French commandos rescued four foreign hostages including two
French citizens from a militant group in Burkina Faso, France's military
said on...
The Foremost Problem Is Moving to Stormfront
-
Good news. This blog is moving to Stormfront. The transition might take
several months. Current content will remain in place for historical
purposes for as...
Memories of a Friend
-
It’s been 1 year since Oscar died, and I’ve been reluctant to write an
obituary for him because I didn’t think I could put into […]
The post Memories of ...
Daily Readings 01-27-2019
-
IS BIG TECH MERGING WITH BIG BROTHER? KINDA LOOKS LIKE IT A FRIEND OF mine,
who runs a large television production company in the car-mad city of Los
Angel...
Since the U. S Knew Syria Had Chemical Weapons
-
And since the U. S. knew where the chemical weapons were being made
And since the U. S. knew where the chemical weapons were being stored
*Why didn't the U...
The Market Ticker - The Pattern of The Market
-
*Looks awfully similar to 2008.*
*Rotation back and forth, with most of the gains coming in a handful of big
names with big stories -- but no earnings to...
An inside peek at Silicon Valley for media leaders
-
In recent years, I have conducted media-and-technology study tours in New
York, London and Silicon Valley for high-level publishing executives. This
year, ...
The End is Nigh
-
Dear Reader,
It is over five years since I wrote the last published piece for this blog.
A lot has happened during that time: the unprecedented rioting in ...
New Book from John Weeks!
-
My colleague John Weeks has just published a very relevant book laying bare
the logical and practical problems with economic policies informed by
mainstrea...
Gold Stocks - All Perspective Has Been Lost
-
Many recent published commentaries appear to have lost perspective on the
now much-hated Gold stock sector. The fact of the matter is that,
technically, t...
Feeling sorry for the rats.
-
'*What's in the box*?'
-David Mills, Se7en
'*And the eye-in the-sky is watching us all.*'
-Ace Rothstein, Casino
'*To be modern only means to fill new f...
Twitter Digest: 2013-06-09
-
Given that I block NSA & PRISM tweets, was entertaining tuning into twitter
& trying to figure why everyone was on about Lord Snowdon -> Turned on GoT
toni...
College Graduates Are The New Debt Slaves
-
With the average cost of attending college in America at $120,000, a family
of four should expect their children’s college to cost more than a home.
Yet...
Gates of Vienna Has Moved
-
[image: Time to go!]After being taken down twice by Blogger within a single
week, we got the message:
*It’s Time To Go.*
Gates of Vienna has moved to...
Marc Faber: Germany Should Have Left The Euro
-
On Bloomberg:
Remember: nothing has been fixed...
“If you put one or 100 sick banks in a union, it does not change the fact
that they're sick. In my vi...
Moved Over
-
I’ve been blogging away over at my new blog at Next New Deal, come join me
over there! Here’s the new rss feed. I might post here once in a great
while, m...
The Automatic Earth on the move
-
Purchase our new 2014 set of video downloads at TheAutomaticEarth.com At
around 6 PM EST, Sunday, February 5, 2012, The Automatic Earth has moved to
its ne...
Occupy Wall Street - Marine vs 30 Cops
-
Speaking of the police. Here is a link to a video of a soldier - in uniform
- protesting the treatment of demonstrators by the police.
http://perezhilton....
We've Moved!
-
If you're reading this, it means you've been following the
http://georgewashington2.blogspot.com address. We switched over to
WordPress, and from now on...
The Inchoate Rage Beneath our Global Cities
-
“London’s riots prompted commentators on the right to blame hooliganism,
while those on the left cited frustrations with the UK’s faltering economy
and fis...
Natural History of Fire & Flood Cycles
-
In reference to the analogies presented in my previous article, please have
a look at this article: Natural History of Fire & Flood Cycles While
reading it...
1930s Vs Today: Lots To Worry About
-
I have written an article about the similarities between now and the great
depression, which I will post at a later date. However, for now, I just
noticed ...
A devoted student of why nations and empires succeed or fail. In general, I believe in the following:
Sparta - not Athens;
Strength over Weakness;
National Competition and Supremacy in a dangerous world;
Time when we shop till we drop, attend Christmas functions and entertain visitors, and then collapse in a heap until New Years!
In that vein then, with the closing of the old year and the ringing in of the New, I'm offering some "Predictions" for the nation and the economy for 2010.
I do want to emphasize, though, that these are strictly my own observations, with no guarantee that they will actually happen!
In no particular order, then, here are my fearless predictions and prognostications for 2010:
1) The Stock Market continues its steady upward climb all through 2010, with the Dow reaching 11,500 by 3Q 2010. The S&P 500 will remain in a range between 1100-1200, while the NASDAQ rises above 2500, and the Russell 2000 index approaches 800-850. As funds flow out of fixed income into equities, gold will continue to drop to the 940-960 range, as gold investors take profits and redeploy funds into stocks;
2) Despite the rise in the stock market, fundamentals of the real economy remain weak, with unemployment approaching 11% by 3Q of 2010. Capacity Utilization remains below 70%, as increasing orders for durables and inventory rebuilding leads to increased manufactured goods imports from China. A second wave of mortgage foreclosures hits, this time concentrated in the "Prime" and "Alt-A" credit segments. Boosting the trend are an increasing number of homeowners with good credit but "underwater" mortgages who decide to "strategically default", further depressing prices;
3) Commercial Real Estate loans begin to default in large numbers, as borrowers who have remained current on their loans can no longer re-finance due to depressed property valuations. As many of these loans are held by local and regional banks, the number of bank failures in 2010 will more than double to over 300;
4) The CityCenter resort and casino development in Las Vegas, a monument to gaudy excess and optimism, fails to attract additional visitors to Las Vegas, instead cannibalizing established properties up and down the Strip. Even unheard-of deals at prime strip properties fail to boost the visitor count. After splitting off its profitable Macau properties, MGM Mirage files Chapter 11 in 3Q 2010, unable to keep up its debt service;
4) Despite the travails of the real economy in the U.S., the dollar continues to strengthen as financial problems in the Eurozone come to a head. Greece, unable to resolve its fiscal problems as sovereign debt approaches 100% of GDP, is saved from default by a combined ECB-IMF intervention, with Spain and Ireland following suit shortly thereafter. All this leads to a flight back to the dollar, despite record-low interest rates and continued Fed money-supply expansion;
5) Due to a strengthening dollar and a linked yuan, China's exports to the U.S. resume growth once again as a recovering US economy means more orders for China's manufacturers. A strengthening dollar also boosts off-shoring of remaining US-based manufacturing, and U.S. manufacturing employment falls below 10% of total employment for the first time ever;
6) The Democrats face huge problems in the November 2010 elections, as rising unemployment and increasing social distress puts voters in an angry mood. The Democratic majority in the Senate falls to 53-47, as key incumbents retire and Majority Leader Harry Reid is defeated for re-election. Republicans, however, fail to take over the House of Representatives as intramural squabbling permits many previously endangered Democrats to squeak through. Republicans are helped, though, by a dozen or so Conservative Democratic Representatives (mostly in the South), who defect to the GOP. In all, Republicans pick up thirty seats, increasing Obama's woes and making compromise more unlikely;
7) A major TBTF U.S. bank actually fails, due to losses in Commercial and Residential Real Estate and huge losses in its credit card portfolio. However, because the machinery for resolution is now in place, the bank is quickly nationalized, broken up and sold, with minimal impact on the general economy. In conjunction with the Fed and Treasury, Goldman Sachs orchestrates the entire transaction, thus cementing its position as the U.S.'s most powerful financial institution;
8) Elin Nordegren divorces Tiger Woods, getting a significant portion of his assets and $2m plus per year in child support, although significantly less than originally predicted in the celebrity press. Tiger, seeing his financial position deteriorate, returns to golf with a vengeance, entering 25 tournaments, winning 13 (including two majors), and establishing an all-time record for money winnings in a PGA season. Golf's TV ratings explode, and endorsements come flooding back, making Tiger once again the world's highest-paid athlete;
9) Sarah Palin, with a huge windfall from "Going Rogue" and lucrative speaking engagements booked all year, decides not to run for President in 2012. However, her continued popularity leads The Fox Network to sign her to her own daily talk show. Her show becomes a huge hit, becoming the new "Oprah" for an increasingly disaffected Middle Class;
10) The continuing drift in the economy leads to several new "Third-Party" political movements, uniting disaffected populists with independents and libertarians. Despite differing ideologies and beliefs, many of these movements come together to challenge ballot-access laws in many states, which give a virtual monopoly to the two major parties. Early efforts focus around building a "unity" 3rd-party ticket of Ron Paul and Alan Grayson for 2012;
Mercifully, the Copenhagen Climate Follies have finally concluded.
After two years of painstaking negotiations, the Copenhagen Summit - billed as the last, best chance for the world's governments to finally get a Grip On Global Warming - ended in farce, with plenty of grandstanding and finger-pointing to go around.
Just by getting a look at the scene you could tell what was coming.
Those world leaders who didn't arrive by Government VIP aircraft did so on the private jets of some of the world's most powerful corporations, from there to be shuttled to and fro by limousine, carefully kept away from the press and the public.
But, "the public" was also in Copenhagen in force - protesting the almost complete lack of progress by the world's governments since the Kyoto Accords of 1998.
But, as we've learned from The Global Financial Crisis, the globe's elites are not going to get involved - unless there's money to be made.
And, judging from the schemes floated at the summit, there are plenty of ways for the Global Elite to continue to plunder the rest of us.
Schemes like "Cap and Trade" and "Carbon Futures". No doubt the Squid and the other investment banks will be all over that. And "Carbon Taxes?' Just what the doctor ordered for the recession-stricken populations of Europe and the U.S. And of course, there are always plenty of "subsidies" to be talked about - on the order of $100 Billion per year by 2020 to poorer countries, to help them cope with environmental degradation and the development of alternate energy sources.
And how did this epic conference end? No Treaty, no Binding Accord, but rather a three-page statement of "glittering generalities", by which we will kick the can down the road for another few years, and hope things don't get too bad in the meantime.
Well, what about it? Just this - Global Warming is a Fact, and in my opinion whether it is Entirely Anthropogenic or not is immaterial.
Because the truth is, we live in a relatively narrow optimal climate and temperature envelope. If we were to hold Mean Global Temperature Increase to 2 degrees Celsius over the next twenty years, we might have a chance on stabilizing things, and even reversing the long-term trend.
But, we've got to be careful here - any secular long-term cooling trend of 2 degrees C. or more, and we're headed toward a Little Ice Age in as few as two hundred years.
The bottom line is this - human existence depends upon maintaining long-term mean global temperatures of between 28 and30 C. Any higher or lower than that, and you've got problems.
And how did the Climate Follies address the issue? By alternately ignoring it and protesting it. The "Emerging Markets" nations, seeing their low-wage, low-regulation advantage over the advanced countries about to be regulated away, stonewalled.
China, which accounts for an astounding 44% of coal-derived greenhouse gas emissions, said it will continue to build coal-fired power plants, as it "studies" the issue. India also deferred action. Brazil, which has contributed hugely to the problem though decades of deforestation, will tackle the problem - if it gets subsidies from the rich nations to do so.
So what are we in the U.S. to do? I would say that until the U.N. Climate Conference can get better organized, maybe we should just do what we are already doing - moving gradually away from petroleum-based motor fuels, getting away from coal for power generation, and moving toward natural gas, renewables and (yes) nuclear power for the long term.
Even de-industrialization and offshoring have helped - by dismantling our industrial base and shipping it to China India, Korea and Mexico, we've made our industrial pollution problem someone else's.
Remember, it's better to be unemployed, poverty-stricken and environmentally pure than otherwise.
Who says mass unemployment can't benefit somebody?
Look for our "elites" to be telling us that around election time, when we ask about re-industrialization and "onshoring" jobs back to the United States.
"Can't be Done" - they'll say. "Global Warming" and all that.
Really? Well, I suppose we'll just have to make things a little warmer for you.
What's the "Carbon Footprint" of Pitchforks and Torches?
It seems to have taken nearly forever, but at last the Senate seems ready to move on Health Care Reform.
After thirteen straight hours of negotiation with holdout Democratic Senator Ben Nelson of Nebraska, it appears the Senate's version of Health Care Reform is ready for a final vote.
After reconciliation with the House version, the plan is to present this to President Obama for signature immediately after the Holiday recess.
But, after considering the final product of all this effort, I'm beginning to wonder if this whole exercise was really worthwhile.
To be sure, there are some nominal reforms in the bill. Health care coverage will be extended to some thirty million people now uninsured. Health Insurance companies will no longer be able to deny coverage for pre-existing conditions. Nor will they be allowed to deny claims for illnesses contracted while covered. Annual and lifetime caps on coverage will be eliminated, caps and ceilings will be put on premiums, and premium subsidies will be made available for lower-income workers to afford coverage.
Well, on the surface it does sound like an improvement. But, as usual, the devil is in the details. And, after studying the details of this bill, in my opinion it would be better if it did not pass.
Let's take a look at the first so-called "reform" - the extension of coverage to the thirty million currently uninsured. This will be accomplished by "mandating" that these individuals purchase coverage, or pay a fine.
Now, when it comes to a mandate, I'm all in favor of "mandating" that people be covered by such things as social security. Social security is a universal coverage government benefit program, and the premiums for it are handled through the tax system.
But I have a real problem forcing people people to spend after-tax dollars on private health insurance that is subject to no meaningful cost controls or competitive constraints. That provision, however desirable it might be, may not survive the legal challenges it will undoubtedly attract from conservatives.
But wait - aren't there other provisions in the bill that we might consider reform? How about the ban on denying coverage for pre-existing conditions?
Well, let's see. As written, the bill contains no fines, penalties, or enforcement mechanisms to punish insurance companies wrongfully denying coverage. That means that the insurers will "handle" pre-existing conditions by raising premiums so high that no one would sign up unless one consented to "exclude" the pre-existing condition. To my mind,that's not reform.
The same situation applies to lifetime and annual "caps" on coverage. No enforcement mechanisms - only vague statements of intent. You don't have to be a rocket scientist to figure out how the insurance companies will get around that one. The same thing applies to the ban on dropping coverage once you get sick.
Without enforcement - and the regulatory and administrative apparatus to support it - nothing will happen except the Health Care Cartel will gain thirty million additional customers at whatever prices it chooses to charge.
Now, let's look at what's not in the bill. First of all, No Public Option. Without a universally available Public Option, the Health Cartel will face no competitive pressure and no restrictions on its profitability.
And no "early eligibility" for Medicare either. This modest reform, first proposed in these pages three months ago, would have dropped the eligibility age for Medicare from 65 to 55 under certain circumstances.
This reform I felt made a lot of sense. It would have removed many of the chronically ill (and those likely to fall ill), from insurance company rolls and thus actually helped insurance company profitability. In my proposal, I would have dropped eligibility immediately to age 59-1/2, and gradually extended eligibility downward to 50 over a period of years.
This could have been done, championed as a major reform, and set the stage for the eventual adoption of the only reform that makes sense for an advanced country - single payer, universal coverage. But what happened? It was floated up only long enough to get rid of the public option -and then it disappeared.
And cost controls on pharmaceuticals? That didn't even make it to Congress - it was killed in a private, campaign-contribution laden agreement between the White House and the Pharmaceutical lobby.
To sum up, then, about the only thing in this bill is thirty million new customers for the Health Care Cartel - and nothing else that can't either be bargained away in the House-Senate conference or dropped later.
No wonder Wall Street - that other great bastion of the people's well-being - sent the stocks of the Health Insurance and Pharmaceutical companies to 52-week highs.
And that seals it for me. If Wall Street thinks that this is a great idea, it almost certainly isn't good for the country.
Sometimes, no deal is better than a bad one.
And this is a bad deal for the American Public. It contains no meaningful coverage or cost reforms. What we'll wind up with is less care, more costs, and more profit and bonus dollars in the hands of an undeserving CEO class, wrung out of an impoverished and increasingly destitute and desperate citizenry.
Mr. President, on Health Care Reform, We Aren't There Yet.
Are those "Green Shoots" finally poking up through the snow?
According to the Bureau of Labor Statistics, we may have finally turned the corner on Unemployment.
In its monthly statistical report released Friday, the number of "jobs lost" in November was a mere 11,000, while the overall unemployment rate declined from 10.2% to 10.0%.
Judging by the response, the mainstream media and the financial Powers That Be were falling all over themselves in self-congratulation that the "Worst is Behind Us".
The irrepressible (and in my mind completely irresponsible) Jim Cramer was celebrating the end of the "Jobless Recovery", along with the usual self-serving promoters and shills in the chorus.
The Administration also took this as signs that "its policies are working" and started thumping the tubs for its "Employment Summit" later this week.
To all of those with a stake in the status quo, things couldn't be looking better. And those with an immediate stake in some economic good news, like embattled Fed Chairman Ben Bernanke, started grasping at this straw with the hope of a drowning man clinging to driftwood.
But the question does remain - have we turned a corner? Or is this merely a statistical aberration? Or, as the conspiracy theorists have it, have these numbers been doctored to achieve a certain outcome?
My take on the above: No, Yes, and Maybe.
On the first question, "have we at last turned the corner?" my vote is No.
To begin with, this remarkable decline in the rate of job loss is unconfirmed by any other statistical measure. Hours worked for both manufacturing and non-manufacturing employees is up from 33.0 hours per week to an anemic 33.1 , well below full employment numbers and well within the range of statistical error.
Other measures of economic activity - rail and trucking carloads, inventories, and new orders - are flat to slightly down. Thus, this remarkable piece of "good news", while welcome, has to stand as unconfirmed by any other measure.
In fact, if you want to take a very pessimistic stance and drill down a little bit, the complementary statistics for unemployment are as dim as ever. The percentage of "counted" unemployed that have been unemployed longer than 36 weeks (9 months) is 38.6% of all unemployed - the highest number in 25 years. And while the number of those unemployed for less then 9 weeks has dropped significantly (from 15.3% of total unemployed to 11.6%) over the last three months, the other Quartile measurements of unemployment duration have been growing.
What does this mean? It means that people, once unemployed, are moving to the ranks of the long-term unemployed - and staying there. This is also also confirmed by the broad measure of unemployment U6, which counts the unemployed, the discouraged, and the crucially important "unemployment effect of reduced hours" (i.e. for every four people cut back from 40 hours to 32, add one to the "currently unemployed" head count).
That number remains a depressing 17.2%.
Which brings up the second question - is this miraculous Unemployment figure a statistical aberration? I think we can safely say Yes.
To begin with, any raw count of U3 (the official unemployment rate), has a Mean Statistical Error of +/- 100,000. This number has remained very consistent, even adjusting for its dependent variables labor force size and labor force participation rate. So, allowing for error, the true number could be anywhere from -11,000 to -111,000, depending upon sample size and methodology, both of which the BLS is free to alter at any time.
Further, when you take into account Seasonal adjustment, which normally adjusts LFS (labor force size) and LFPR (labor force participation rate) upward to account for seasonal Holiday retail and shipping employment, this purportedly good report is skewed further.
So, to confirm whether or not this "good news " is real, I'm going to look at a proxy for the BLS numbers - The ADP payrolls report, which measures an approximation of U3 through payroll rather than household data.
The ADP numbers for November? Job Loss = -169,800 (still dismal, but improving), with a Holiday Seasonal adjustment of +52,000.
Conclusion? Statistical and seasonal aberration most likely, with all numbers within allowed statistical error.
Finally, we come to the "Conspiracy Theorist" outlook, most frequently bandied about by websites such as Zero Hedge, NakedCapitalism, Calculated Risk, and others.
Basically, the "conspiracy" meme runs like this - The Administration, Congress, The Fed, and the TBTF banks (most prominently Goldman Sachs), were going to drastically cook the November unemployment numbers to mislead the people. And on the surface, there's some justification for this.
The forecasters were predicting that retailers were facing the worst Holiday retail season in a generation. More retail chain bankruptcies were predicted for the first quarter of 2010, with all the attendant negative fallout for employment and commercial real estate.
That's not what the Powers That Be want to hear, goes the theory, so watch for an "October Surprise" - namely, unemployment numbers that would be miraculously optimistic, in order to goose consumer spending.
Did that happen? In my opinion - Maybe, but only because this relatively meaningless statistical improvement has been flogged beyond all credibility as being "positive" by mainstream media types who should know better.
Even Goldman Sachs - the hated Squid - put out its November expectations as an improving (but still negative) -101,000, with a qualifier to not expect much improvement in the first or second quarters of 2010.
This, in my mind, is consistent with the other data.
So - in conclusion? Things are still bad, but slowly getting less so, and the economy will continue to bounce along the bottom for the next several months.
Now that is not good news, for the politicians especially - but we'll cover that later. And as for the "Green Shoots?"
It's been an interesting week for followers of Celebrity Gossip.
This time, it's golfs' Mr. Clean - Tiger Woods - who's caught up in the latest "Who's been sleeping with who" media frenzy.
Tiger, my man, what's up with that?
First of all, there was the mysterious car crash outside your house at 2:30 am.
Next, there was the ambulance ride to the hospital to be treated for cuts, bruises and lacerations.
Finally, the refusal to talk to the authorities, until your PR and legal people could damp things down.
Tiger, for a professional athlete, this whole thing has been a PR nightmare and a potential legal and financial disaster. For someone whose judgment on the golf course has been so good, this is the kind of misstep we might expect of a Tour Rookie.
First of all, if you're going to Tomcat around, you take some basic precautions.
And one of the first ones is to NOT have your girlfriends on the cell phone speed dial.
That's how Elin found out. She went through your phone and found Rachel, Jaimee and Kaliqua.
Next, she hired a "Private Detective to the Stars" and found out quite a bit.
Like you had Rachel flown out to Australia for the Australian Masters, and that you later sent her on to Dubai, of all places, with some cash for her time and trouble. She also found out that you'd been seeing her for quite some time, and that you've paid her over $ 1m for her time and silence.
And just who is Rachel Uchitel? A thirtyish sometime model and professional bicoastal party girl, previously linked to Derek Jeter and Manny Ramirez.
Next, she found out about Jaimee Grubbs, a sometime cocktail waitress and medical marijuana dealer from LA. Seems she's about to cash in on her fifteen minutes of fame with a million-dollar tell-all to the tabloids and a nude photo shoot.
And then, there's Kaliqua Moquin - a statuesque Las Vegas nightclub hostess, well known as the "Diva" of Las Vegas' overpriced and under-regulated nightclub scene. She's been all over the media with stories about champagne and cocaine-fueled bacchanalia on your very frequent solo visits to Las Vegas, where, according to her , you've also dropped quite a bit at the tables as well.
And her former boyfriends? Rappers Jay-Z, Li'l Wayne and Eminem.
PGA Tour, meet Da Hood.
Wow - sex, drugs, and gambling. No wonder Elin took a 3-iron upside your head before you tried to get away in the Escalade.
So, now that's its all out in the open, what do you do? You need to take charge.
First of all, you should talk to your off-season friends who've been caught up in the same thing. Guys like Kobe Bryant and David Letterman.
Kobe will tell you it will not be cheap. Vanessa got $5 million in cash upfront and a large upgrade in the prenup. Letterman also had to fork over to the wife big time. And since Elin has already talked to her friend Vanessa Bryant about how to handle things, you can expect to pay up several million immediately, and upgrade the pre-nup as well.
Hey, it's par for the course - don't complain. And since the thrashing by Elin's 3-iron was nothing compared to the world-class ass-chewing you got from your own mother, carrying on about shame, embarrassment and loss of face, you need to make right with Wife, Mother, and Mother-In-Law (all of whom live with you - yikes) and then get your story out in a friendly forum.
And I know just the guy. You know him too. You need to call Jim Rome and either go on his radio show (for a whole show including call-ins) or go on ESPN's Rome is Burning.
Romey has been all over this all week, but mostly in a sympathetic vein.
So break off a call to Jay Stew the phone slap, and go on the show. You've been in The Jungle before, so you know what to expect. Tough love - but love nonetheless.
And next season, be all business. Get those majors. And since I expect Elin, your Mother, and your Mother-In-Law to be "chaperoning" you on tour, just suck it up and take care of business.
Both your game and your life will be the better for it.
In the meantime, here's a couple of things from YouTube for my reader's enjoyment: